Woman tired of dating apps leaves applications in neighbours letterboxes

3 min read

She’s all of us! 

We think we speak for every human being when he say dating is difficult. 

Love is difficult. 

Relationships are difficult. 

It’s all bloody difficult. 

The only thing keeping us from teetering completely off the edge and into a deep dark pool of cynicism is the tiny glimmer of hope that somewhere out there is our person. 

 

But, hope as we may, dating is still damn difficult. And dating apps do absolutely nothing to help with the struggle. 

Once you sort through the teenagers and flick past the dudes who are only in it for a root and ignore the unsolicited dick pics, all you’re left with are weirdos and clingy-types and ain’t nobody got time for that. 

How do you find your Edward Cullen in a pack of Jacob Blacks? (#TeamEdward). 

Your Lady Gaga in a pack of Lindsay Lohans? (My god that’d be terrifying). 

Your Cedric Diggory in a pack of Neville Longbottoms? (Pre-glow up Neville). 

You write a dating application letter and drop it in your neighbours letterboxes. 

Which is exactly what one Melbourne woman did. 

The letter was posted to this Reddit thread and makes for some seriously entertaining and relatable reading. 

“Are you single and between the age of 26 and 34? Read on…”

Getting straight to the point from the start, we like it. 

The letter then goes on to specify a list of personality/lifestyle requirements that are necessary for the applicant to be considered worthy: 

  • “No, I don’t do one night stands, so you can f*** off elsewhere. Genuine people only please.”
  • “I’m female and I’m straight.”
  • “You live in Geelong/Melbourne area.”
  • “You are between 25 and 34.”
  • “You live a life without reliance on drinking and drugs.”
  • “You keep fit, without being obsessed about it.”
  • “Please, no gym photos, no cliche photos. It’s all been done. Be a bit different.” 
  • “If we meet it will be in a cafe or a restaurant. Got to keep it safe.”
  • “I am looking for a relationship, not a f*** buddy.”

Honestly? Fair. 

Who wouldn’t want to date a stable, sensible human being who looks after themselves?

Despite us supporting the woman’s set of criteria 100%, some people on the internet have other feelings, labelling the letter as “toxic.”

“Calling poor mental health “unsexy” is potentially the most vile commentary I’ve ever heard,” one Reddit user wrote. 

Another commented, “wants a committed long-term relationship but also refuses to be part of a partner’s mental health.”

“Yeah this sounds like one toxic individual.”

But other people on Reddit agree with us that the demands are reasonable and were quick to jump to the letter-writers defence. 

“Is it necessarily wrong to look for good mental health in a romantic partner?’ said one user. 

While another wrote, “she’s just a human trying her best, trying something different.”

And honestly, we bloody applaud her for it. 

Like we said, dating is DIFFICULT so major props to this legend for doing something to cut through the thick layer of bull poopie that is online dating and stand out from the pack. 

If it’s any consolation, we would totally date you. 

Images: The Simpsons / Fox. 

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Written By Krisinda Merhi
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